Coparenting, COVID, and College Admissions
By Julie M. Cillo, Esquire
Owens & Owens, PLC
Helping your child navigate the college selection process can be a daunting task, more so with COVID-19 making the territory even more unknown. Add to the mix being separated and/or divorced parents and sometimes the stress, anxiety, and uncertainty can be overwhelming for everyone, especially your child. Whether you share physical custody with the other parent or whether one parent has primary physical custody, working together to support your child during an important stage of life is invaluable. Here are some thoughts to keep in mind during this pivotal time.
Good co-parenting is important; keep communications clear and respectful; for example if one or both of you have certain factors that your child must consider in the college search, discuss it calmly and be open to other perspectives;
Determine in advance who might take your child on college visits and try to come up with a schedule so you can each share that experience;
Keep each other informed about how college visits went;
Be supportive of your child and refrain from arguments about college in front of him or her – they already are nervous even if they don’t seem to be. Remember, by the time they head off to college, they will be adults – out of the reach of custody orders and agreements – but will still look to you for your opinions;
In addition to College Solutions, consider a coparenting coach if communications are difficult so that coach can assist in how to talk about college productively with your child.
Make sure you understand the FAFSA and whose income has to be reported depending on whether your child lives with one parent more or with both parents equally and especially if either of you have remarried. Understand what financial information may need to be shared with each other if you want your child to have the best opportunity for financial aid and scholarships. Have a copy of your existing support orders, property settlement agreements, final decrees accessible as they may be needed for the FAFSA. Emotions run high during the college selection process and emotions run high for some separated/divorced families who are trying to co-parent. This mix can be difficult to navigate, but if you can try to remember that your child is the focus, hopefully that will enable you to enjoy this time and process. You are helping your child with the next chapter in life.